Should I be packing?!

Ok so I just wrote an entire blog post, went to spell check and somehow deleted the whole thing!!!  GRRR!  This may be shorter than I had planned!
We are ONE PIECE OF PAPER away from hopping on the plane!  We are so close!  If you could say a prayer for our son to get his visa in the next week, preferably the next day or two we would appreciate it!  I'm not sure how much I plan on posting about our travel on this blog but I do have a private FB page that I plan on updating a little more.  So if you would like to follow our adventure to picking up our sweet son please send me a note!  Otherwise, I will post here once back! 
This journey has been HARD!  Emotionally draining.  I don't do so good with not having control and in adoption you have NO CONTROL over 90% of the process.  So its funny because I have this misperception that things are going to get back to normal once J is home.  Once he is home we can relax, the stress of the unknown is behind us.   My kids can have their Mommy's attention back, my husband can get his wife back.  Ill be back to cooking and cleaning regularly.  Ill start working out regularly like I did before we started this adoption.   Maybe I can even ditch my "happy pills!"  We will all finally be together and everything will be peachy.....right?  I can hope???  Ha Ha!  I have been warned many times that the first year is a very difficult year but I guess we will soon find out! 
No matter what lies ahead I am so excited to bring our son home.  To see him and give him a hug and kiss for the first time.  After all I have been staring at his sweet face since MARCH!  I cant wait to bring him home and introduce him to our three children waiting to greet their new brother.  Our youngest Cash is so excited!  He has been the one asking the most about when will we bring his brother home!  I cant wait for that moment when Cash finally gets to give his brother a high five!  I cant wait for J to meet the rest of our family, friends, and church.  To watch him enjoy and maybe not enjoy all of his "firsts!"  So much to look forward to, I just want to enjoy the thought of it all right now, even if it may not be quite what I expect.

inching closer.....

We are coming little one, we promise....

I get asked all the time whats taking so long!  Ugh, I know, it's frustrating.  I wish adoption didn't take so long or cost so much, but the fact is it just does.  It's a long process with a big price tag.  Lots of court fees, lawyer fees, the agency you pay to work on your case, flights, medicals, child care.   The list goes on.   Now when we had our 3 children naturally the medical bill was enormous as well, but we were able to pay it off over time. Adoption does not give you that option.  I feel so so blessed to be financially able to adopt, I really do.  But it stinks that there are so many families who would be great families for these children but don't feel they are able to financially.  I want to encourage everyone to not let money stop you from doing something you feel called to do.  The money will come.  It will.  There are also many loans and grants out there for adoptive families.  And God just has a way of providing what you need!

Ok, I had no intention on talking about money in this post:)  I really just wanted to update everyone on where we are at.  So Last week we got our i600 approval which is a HUGE step in the final process.  So not only is he our son in Congo, the US recognizes him as our son now too.  Whew, cuz I really didn't want to have to live in    Congo(-:  Seriously one thing I have learned through this process is just when you celebrate finishing one huge step, there is another step waiting right around the corner.  Its one thing after another.  Lots and lots of ups and downs.  I am happy to say that in a process of about 50 steps though we are now down to the last 2.  Up next is our embassy date.  OH wait, I mean up next is waiting to hear "when" our embassy date will be.  then once we have that date, we can get the visas.  This could all happen in a matter of 2 weeks.  We could be on a plane in two weeks holding our sweet boy.  BUT.....EVERYTHING IS CLOSED!  Yeah, not too excited about that but what can we do.  It's looking like we are going to have to wait for our little man a little longer.  Once things open back up the first of the year we will be on our way to baby J!!  I cant wait to hold him in my arms.  What an amazing day that will be.....

So close yet so far away.....

We are happy to say that the final paperwork has been filed and now we are just waiting for approval to go ahead and get visas!  It's a very important and exciting step filing the i600, and its a step we have been patiently waiting for.  Yet for some reason instead of being overjoyed I just feel so far from having him in our arms.  Somedays I feel like he is slipping away, like he's not even ours anymore.  I think I am feeling this way because we thougth for sure he would be here by now.  According to our agency we could have him anywhere from Sept -Nov.  Now its hard to admit but he may not even be home before Christmas.  This is hard as we have family who really wanted to meet him and will likely not be able to for a while now.  I know we are SOOOO close and I need to just trust God and his amazing timing.  If he is not home before Christmas we will most likely be traveling the first of the year.  thats not too far away:)  If you can pray specifically for our process pray that our i600 gets approved next week and can travel a few weeks after that. 

Another prayer request.....there is conflict going on in Congo that could start another war.  Its absolutely horrible what they are doing to the innocent people in this country.  Our son is in a safe place as of right now but with the risk of a war who knows how that will affect everything.  My heart hurts for these people and wish there was more we could do.  I will include an article below.  http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&frm=1&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&sqi=2&ved=0CDEQqQIwAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.kansascity.com%2F2012%2F11%2F20%2F3927734%2Ffall-of-goma-in-eastern-congo.html&ei=dzasUJCXK6eAiwLa-YGYCg&usg=AFQjCNGGqunl7RXksDCr-pn6U7mjBuIc4g

On another note the Gillette Summer of Hope program is in its beginning stages right now and if there is anyone who would like to know more about it please contact me!  We did a presentation at our church this weekend and had a good response to the program.  We will be having an informational meeting the on December 1st 2pm at High Plains Community Church.  Come and see what it is all about and how you can be involved.  Its an amazing ministry!
www.summerofhope.org

Ill keep ya posted on our travel time!  Happy Thanksgiving!
Haley

Introducing the newest member of our family!!!

Our mandatory 30 day wait is UP!  He is OURS!  Introducing Gray # 6!  Oh I love this little boy! 

You grew in my heart - not in my belly....

The title of this post says it all!  Its amazing how much I already love this litttle boy I have yet to meet!  My heart aches for him, my mind is going crazy with worry, Im a bit more moody (look out:-), Ive put on a few extra pounds (no stretch marks yet), Ive gone through every cabinet, drawer, closet, and toy box, and anyone who enters my house leaves with an armload of "stuff" they probably never wanted in the first place!  Ive painted J's room, filled his closet  and dresser with tons of clothes, and find myself staring at his room in anticipation of seeing my son in his own room and with our family.  Anyone with children know what I am talking bout?  This whole nesting thing is just as present as it was with my three bio children!  It's different, yes, but it's 100% there.  No, I dont get the opportunity to hear his heart beet,  feel those sweet feet kicking my belly, or feel him hickup inside me (LOVE) but I do get to see pictures of his sweet face and see him smile (by the way I plan on sharing his photo next blog so stay tuned!)  I know that doesnt seem like alot but somehow it is enough to make me head over heels in love with him, just as I was so in love with my three children that grew in my belly.   He is growing more and more in my heart:-)

Alot of postive things have happened since we passed court.  J was transfered to a new "transition home" in a new city where we will be picking him up.  This is HUGE!  HUGE!  For one, the place he was in was in a very remote location where necessities were limited.  The region he was in was also very scary and unsafe.  While many adoptive parents get to see more photos and even hire people to visit their kiddos we could not as his region was too unsafe to enter:-(  BUT, now he is in a different home getting the care he should be, and this home is much safer and even has security guards.  So glad to know my litttle boy is SAFE!  We will be getting more frequent updates as well as communication is much better with this home.  There are families who are there picking up their own kiddos as well so we should be receiving information and photos from them too.  The best part of this move is that this is the END part in this whole process!  This is where the kids whos parents are very close to the finish line are at!  I CANT WAIT!!!!  Even though I am so happy for J to be in better care I am full of mixed emotion.  This poor little guy had been in one orphanage since birth.  Im sure leaving it was just as hard as taking a two year old away from his parents.  That is the only home he has ever known and the caregivers were "his Mommas".  And not to mention he most likely had NEVER driven in a car and definatly not in an airplane!  I wonder if he was scared while he was thousands of feet in the air?  I wonder if he cried?  I wonder who was with him?  Does he understand this is for the better? (doubt it) How confusing this must all be for this child. I cant even imagine what he must be going through. Did they let him say his goodbyes to his foster mommas?  How could we ever thank his foster moms enough for doing the best they could caring for my son for over two years?    We will never know who they are.  Sadly neither will J. 
Once again I ask for your prayers.  Please pray that J can understand to the best of his ability that this is all for the better.  Please pray that The Lord prepares his heart for us, and that the Lord prepares our own hearts and minds for the arrival of our son as we know it is not all going to be easy.  However, this is a challenge I CAN NOT WAIT TO TAKE ON!!!!
God Bless!  Haley

We have judgement!!!!!

Praise the Lord!!!  FINALLY we have heard those words we have been longing to hear!  The judge has given us written judgement!   We still have 30 days to wait before we can shout to the world that "J" is legally our son but we are one big step closer!  The 30 days is there to give any family members the chance to step forward and request custody of him.  However, we have been informed that this is very unlikely especially in "J's" case as he was abandoned at birth and there are no known relatives.  Iv'e always wondered why this step isnt taken before judgement, but it is what it is and we are thrilled that we are one huge step closer to bringing home our son!

Happy Birthday "J"!!!

Its been a long time since I have posted anything.  For one its hard to find time to sit down in peace and quiet and blog and another is that nothing has really happened.  Our dossier was submitted to court and has been sitting there since late June early July.  We thought we would hear that we passed court (J is legally ours) by the end of July.  Well its almost September and we have heard NOTHING!  So anyone that is reading this will you please pray that the Judge may look over our case and grant us custody of our son!  I am longing to hear those words so badly! 

On August 20th out sweet son turned TWO!  How bittersweet this day was for me.  I am so thankful that his birth Mommy gave him life and left him somewhere safe but so sad that we can not be with him to let him know how special he is and how much he is loved.  I doubt he was even aware it was a special day for him:(  We did eat some cake and ice cream in his honor so when he is older he can see that his second birthday WAS special and his family did celebrate his life.

"Happy birthday buddy!"

I still am overwhelmed at the amount of orphans in this world.  Seems like every week I see pictures of some new children who have become parentless.  It is so hard to see these faces, some with the most precious smiles I have ever seen, some with tears in their eyes, some who look so confused.  Honestly if Jeff felt as strongly as I do about these children we would be pursuing another adoption along with our current one.  Its not that I enjoy being crazy busy, stressed, overwhelmed, but I feel led to help these orphans!  But for now I will pray for these children to find their forever families before it is too late.  So many children have passed away waiting, some outgrow the system waiting and are left to face the world with out the love and guidance of a family. 

I am currently working on an organization who brings older orphans to the states for a hosting program to expand here in Gillette, WY.  It is called Summer of Hope out of Bozeman, MT.  It has been proven to be very sucessful in finding the older children families.  Children who would likely not be adopted because they are over 6 years of age would come to the states and live with a family for about 4-5 weeks over the summer.  These children do now know they are potentially going to be adopted but rather think of it as a summer vacation.  The family then can pursue the adoption when the 5 weeks is up.  It is an amazing program and I can't wait to get it running here in our community and help find these still so young children loving families! 

"Once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do.  God, who weighs on our hearts and keeps our souls, knows what we know, and holds us responsible to act." Prov. 24:12

This is a great video on adoption...please take a moment to watch!